I know people haven’t found this yet but they will! You did, so enjoy!
I have been noticing a lot lately that people are asking me what it is I’m up to, or what is going on in my life? I always think the question is related to what I’m doing with and for God but I’m not sure about that. Sometimes it makes me uncomfortable because if it doesn’t appear that I am doing anything big and wonderful then I sense people wondering “hmmm what’s really going on with her? ”
Well, let me tell you!
Returning from the field was so difficult for me. When we were serving the Ministry of LWT as the Directors I felt so fulfilled. Not only that but many people viewed us as successful. There were a lot of cheerleaders pushing us on and applauding us! it was so awesome. The support and affirmation of others was a great boost for me.
Obeying God to leave the field was a very hard desicion for both Henry and I. We love the people and ministry sooooo muuucchh!!! We were walking in the things we trained for and doing a good job too. Yet, we are confident the Lord did lead us to come home and He is still leading us today even though things have been challenging for us. We know the assignment set before us and we know we will walk into it.
There are days that I miss everyone and everything in Guatemala so much that I ache inside. However, when I see the success and how much my children have blossomed here I am satisfied that I heard the voice of the Lord.
It is self sacrificing to be a parent. It isn’t always easy to see the needs of our children and give them the same courtesy we give others in submitting to what is good for them. I see tremendous growth, healing and confidence in my girls. These are so neccessary for them to enter society whole and equipted. I am glad we made the desicion to come to Lansing and I’m thankful for Lansing Christian School and the staff who lead and love our children with Godly wisdom and care.
I titled this blog Marinating In Him because this is what I’ve been doing for the last 3 years.
MARINATING in HIM!! I have been sitting in a place that is actually very hard on my flesh! I have wanted to run or change my circumstances because they are not really that comfortable and enjoyable. I am actually in a very hard place!!!! I am loving the ministry but I miss my friends so much!!! I have also come to realize that it’s not about what others think about me but about what God thinks of me. I love and appriciate the leaders who have blessed me, but my joy and acceptance come from Father. I am at peace in Him. I do not feel the need to be great! I am so secure in Him. My inward man is growing with God and that’s what counts.
One day in paryer the Lord just brought up that word “MARINATE” to me and said… “that’s what’s happening Susan, I am doing a deep work in those tough hard places that are not surrendered yet. You wouldn’t even have seen them had you not walked through this valley.”
I knew that this is my answer to that question that seems to come all too often…” so what have you been doing” or “How is it going? “ ” Hey, I’m marinating in the tenderizing, sweet seasoning power and work of the Lord, in the Holy Spirit. He’s doing a deep work in me that you can’t see but the fruit of it will produce the deeper life that I am seeking. I am going deeper in Christ!” It is a sweet time for me friends. I am enjoying life. I am enjoying this place as I wait for the next instruction. I have become more confident in the fact that the Christian Life is not one outwardly, but the inner man of the heart is what counts!
I love you
Have a blessed time with Father!